Saturday, June 7, 2008


Successfully closed on our place yesterday, but the afternoon was not without incident. This post violates my unofficial rule of "infertility posts only", so spare yourself the time if you like.

Prior to going to the title company I had to retrieve a few odds & ends from our home, one of which was a bag of garbage. Michigan has been experiencing several days of 90+ temperatures, so this bag of garbage was particularly "soupy" having been thoroughly heated by these temps in our garage. A short, smelly drive ensued and I was at the title company with time to spare - time enough, it turns out, to find a dumpster to deposit my trash into. I found an office building with an unsecured dumpster, pulled up next to it and waited for a crew of gentlemen to return to their building after a Friday lunch out. When they were out of earshot, I stealthily exited my vehicle and retreived the garbage bag from the back seat. Then, holding open the dumpster lid with my left hand while swinging the bag of garbage with my right hand to get it up and into the dumpster, I made my move.

As the garbage bag pendulum neared the bottom of its arc, the bag material stretched and gave way, spewing its contents all over the parking lot in a loud, stinky mess. The crew of gentlement turned out to still be within earshot, and to prove it, stopped abruptly staring into my direction as I held the top half of a dripping garbage bag, still wearing my business suit. There were old chicken breasts, eggs, melted ice cream, etc. in the puddle of garbage before me. I ducked down, grabbed a few of the items and chucked them into the dumpster before getting into my vehicle to depart the scene.

I won't be surprised if I see a fine for littering in my mailbox sometime over the next two weeks. For the record, my wife and I returned to the scene after closing to put the rest of the elements into the dumpster, except for the broken egg shells, a few pieces of glass, and of course, the melted ice cream.

Now that the close is behind us, a quote from Charles Schulz, of Peanuts fame seems relevant:
"That's the secret to life... replace one worry with another...."
What shall we worry about next?


Tracy said...

Perhaps I shouldn't have read your post while trying to eat my lunch. Yuck!!!

Congrats on the sale of your home...Not an easy feat these days in Michigan.

Xbox4NappyRash said...

That is so much like something I would do....

Congratulations on the sale.